Thursday it is. Happy to be blogging again. I wanted to do so for such a long time, that now i curse myself for my laziness. But i know that i'll have to shed this layer of restlessness, as it has been long since i did something that made me really happy or made me swell with pride at my creation. I do recall doing such things during my engineering days; but now is the time to move out of this slumber. Firstly i wish to shed some light on NH 58; the thing i think a lot about but care the least. I had started some work on NH 58 during august & september last year and was hopeful of having completed a major chunk by now. But as luck would have it, i lost my MP3 player containing the audio recordings that i made in Chennai while on my way to Chennai from Delhi. It was not the loss of the recordings that bothered me more, it was the inability to listen to my previous recordings & get inspired to think and record more for the book. Then as time went by, i became dis concerned with it as there were graver issues at hand. Then came the day when i bid farewell to Chennai & my small abode which i loved a lot.

I had been living alone for almost 8 months in a small room away from the regular humdrum experienced in a big city like Chennai. This was the first time that i was living alone totally on myself; which was a great opportunity for me to focus on important issues of my life & learn to enjoy myself more. But, i wasted this chance as i meandered to the easier option of acting overtly lazy. Thus, i didn't do as well as thought i would have in terms of honing my physical & mental abilities.

Coming back to NH 58, i came to Bangalore hoping to find some inspiration in this new city from its urban centric life & also from my departure from a solitude filled lonely life. But, as luck would have it; i got entangled in more worthy things. Though i could always find some time between the more discrete matters at hand; i always played the neglect game telling myself that i'll be better when i'll be done with all other things. I guess i am pretty good at playing this game as i wrote down a few points on NH 58 only a few days back. Whatever, i did was not good & moreover the way i delayed myself from writing on NH 58 was even worse. Now i wish to make peace with myself; to make peace between the agitated, harassed and impatient me & the lazy, shy and reclusive me. I know this war should seem heavily lop-sided to the people who know about NH 58; but let me tell you this is the turmoil that i have to go through quite frequently. Now, i wish to learn from my mistakes & wish to do the thing that i have wanted to do for almost 5 years now. Though, through the passage of time things & views have changed a lot; i now face the task of digging through my pile of memories the things that can be made to work for NH 58.